Days of the Iron Boots 

A man came over the lake one winter morning
With a shield of lead and a horse that could not swim
We should have taken that as a warning
It could have been anyone but it was him.

He raised his arm and a thousand voices chanted words of hate
Banners flew and freedom was the cause
I saw the semblance of my father and his son among the crowd
I didn’t want any trouble so I joined the applause. I joined the applause

You might say I never tried to stand up for law and reason
This free rein hunting season can only end…

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The Perfect Traveller 

Beneath the stars along the road the Perfect Traveller speaks

There's nothing that he wants to know, there's nothing that he seeks

He can't remember where he comes from, he doesn't care where he's bound

And all the wonders of the world, both shallow and profound are just ashes on the ground


He does not dwell on memories, the past is not in his mind

The things he sees along the way are the things he left behind

He loves the traces of the swallow's flight he sees but cannot touch

Forgotten realms of the…

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Your love has served me well 

Your love has served me well

In a crazy kinda way

Now that things have calmed down and the fat lady has sung

I find it quite easy to say


The pirate's flag we flew

Was red right from the start

No prisoners be taken, no mercy be shown

A shot straight through the heart


As our city blew fuses we danced in the street

Oh, the stories that we could tell!

I found the reason to live in your smile

Yes, your love has served me well


Now you walk a tired mile

along the lonely shore

Shaking your fist at the wide…

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Strange People 

In Iceland folks eat rotten shark, they bury it down by the seaside

Their beer is dear and they talk right queer, their island is damp and cold

The Finns bake all their bread with bark, they peel it off of the pine trees

They fear the Russians and hate the Swedes. They do as they are told


There are strange people in the world now, we better leave them alone

Think we oughta lock the borders and throw away the key


The Romans feast on tongue of lark, dead birds litter the hillside

Raving orgies every…

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 Young Dan was blessed with bedroom eyes, a brave lad like his name implies

He wanted things and would not be denied.

Local girls they screamed his name, he saw and conquered, then he came.

And when he left they all broke down and cried

He made his mark in the world, and how! Everything was here and now

Life was grand and the road ahead was wide

Then he got older, and then he died.


Patrick was a music man, he was his own greatest fan

Some people said he sucked, but they all lied

He knew if he just kept…

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My Father Was A Werewolf 

My father was a werewolf and he roamed the countryside

His fangs were long and sharp, his territory was wide

Along the way he sang his songs and sang them out of tune

He left a trail of tears and grief beneath the yellow moon

In a far-off village I heard he broke some hearts

I guess young hearts break easily in those foreign parts

Drunken frenzy has no fear, no shame and no remorse

There were burning bridges left behind and a hundred broken doors


Come all ye wankers, hear the story of the beast that…

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King Lear Of The Serpent's Head 

Everything that has been said about the pub "The Serpent's Head"

Is almost true like many stories are

A beacon of forgotten shores, the place was packed with drunks and whores.

They gathered to The Head from near and far

The owner was a man named Lear, he craved for some respect

but no-one listened to him when he spoke

The customers did laugh and sing, they scolded Lear, they called him King

but Lear he never seemed to get the joke


Lear aimed at noble things but missed as everyone was always pissed


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Douchebag Heart 

Standing on this goddamn corner, feeling like a jerk.

You've stood me up and lived to tell so many times before.

I've forgiven you a thousand times, now that just doesn't work.

I'm all out of compassion now, don't have that anymore.


But you who are so smart

Can you really tell apart

Two brothers who share a douchebag heart?


Did you really think you'd get away with patricide?

The law is on your tail, they've got your name and dna.

They asked me if I knew you well and if I was on your side.

I denied you…

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Days Of Pushing Daisies 

Mandy said I wasn't even fit to shine my shoes

Don't hold those words against her, you can blame it all on booze

That said, she was a headless bitch, on this we all agree

She brought misfortune on us but she pinned it all on me


On a dark and rainy street I raised a drunken yell

The bars were closed, the kebab place had nothing left to sell

I never saw it coming, I took a piss against a door

Some crazy bastard whacked my head with a five-foot two-by-four.


Now it's a-OK, I'm happy as a lark.

Now I'm…

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Crazy George 

On the day George Grey got out of gaol he was greeted with applause.

The townsfolk torched the courthouse down, a rabble with a cause

I knew some things, knew the whats and the whereabouts, but never said a damning word.

George kept his secrets to himself, so discretion was preferred.


The loathsome Turk he reigned supreme while George was doing time

A goose-stepping ogre of a man, a cesspool full of slime.

He held his drink well, like a prizefighter in his prime, still standing after 13 rounds


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SoMe Heroes

New Rats single "Days of the Iron Boots" out now!